Depression: a continuous struggle

  Depression can become a compelling neurosis when played into the wrong hands. Each wall of inner protection you have built up over the years is ripped from you like a plaster from a healing wound, until you are helpless. Helpless and alone. People try to understand, but how can you begin to understand something you cant see, that inner entity exists only to its host.

  I have been fighting depression now for the past 2 and a half years and don't believe it is a disease that an individual can be cured from, only numbed of. It fights with your unconscious mind, flaring your emotions into a sense of uncontrollable disarray if left untreated. With my experience I have begun to develop simple coping mechanisms to overcome its interference in simple day-to-day, such as giving myself time limits before I become too worked up by a busy day's activities, which has made a substantial difference when overcoming my anxiety.

  I have received a lot of support from my family and friends with managing my symptoms, but still I feel misunderstood and penalised by the majority. It is clear in my character that I lack confidence, which is constantly recognised and played to my peer's advantage in a working environment: I thrive on praise which can result in my being pushed to take on a heavier workload and then punished when I occasionally do not excel. When you are not accustomed to the struggles of someone suffering with the illness it may be hard to make allowances, but in no way is this acceptable. Depression is often overlooked as just being a 'label' created by celebrities and die-hard excuse makers, but it is real and definitely not easy! I agree, in some instances medication prescribed can be a little placebo; this is generally in cases of mild anxiety experienced by teens, but depression does not fall under just one category. As a result of my employers ignorance I have left my job and remained without work for the past 2 months, which has been refreshing although a lack of routine has left me feeling a little incomplete.

  I have begun to realise that you just cannot please everyone: where you offer someone an explanations, they then throw at you a counterargument. Therefore I am working on pleasing myself.

Melanie
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I have touched vaguely on the idea of Mental Health: if you or anybody you know could be suffering from similar symptoms to those of my own here is a link to a symptom checker conducted by the NHS which could play an important role in the correct diagnosis for you https://www.nhs.uk/symptomcheckers/pages/symptoms.aspx?sat=DHASmentalhealth